If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
