wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
