I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
