I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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