She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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