DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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