sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Is it penis luge time yet?
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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