My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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