i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
