its not stalking. its research.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
