Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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