He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I just googled if crying burns calories
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
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