Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
And then my night got REAL pukey
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize