3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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