Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Green mimosas i think yes
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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