She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
