Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
