Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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