the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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