we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I wish you could order shots online.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
