Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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