don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
