I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
