It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
