I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
