How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
