Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
