He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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