What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
you had me at cake vodka
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
