ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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