Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
