i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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