i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
