Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
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