Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
