Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize