you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
