ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
