It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
