Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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