have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
