I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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