this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize
