I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
