My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Randomize
