I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
