"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
