im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
This is my gift to your gina
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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