party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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