Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
