Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You should frame my arrest warrant.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
