So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize